The following appears at the end of a news story written by journalist Chris Freiberg:
Hill’s attorney, John Everett of Fayetteville, did not return a message left at his office Thursday afternoon.
This is what I call “submarine writing.” The intended thought is partially submerged.
The reporter left a message at the attorney’s office, but he did not really expect the attorney to “return the message.” There’d be no point in returning the message. He wanted the attorney to return an answer to the message.
Better:
Hill’s attorney, John Everett of Fayetteville, did not reply to a message left at his office Thursday afternoon.
or,
Hill’s attorney, John Everett of Fayetteville, did not respond to a message left at his office Thursday afternoon.
